Yeah. Totally agree. Sign up was high maintenancely annoying. I have a wordpress plugin that I think allows the WordPress sign ups over on the bb automatically I think? Might make it easier? Still have to figure out how to connect the two. But your points are valid.

I checked out the links you shared and here’s my thoughts:

Wylie Overstreet’s video has similarity to a particular segment in a program aired on PBS and narrated by Stephen Hawking. I like these kinds of productions which blow people’s minds, give better understanding and perspective about the world and the universe through science-based examples.

Religion joined with Science due to drastic revisions which periodically occur through Christianity’s timeframe. Perhaps to make up for the treatment of Galileo. Many Christian universities and colleges became in existence some centuries ago. Today’s offer excellent science programs and some host lively debate with atheists.

Despite some bridges, persecution of scientists, engineers, physicians still exists today to the point the Advanced Science Serving Society’s, “Science and Human Rights Program Washington DC”, was established in 2003. One can check out cases from around the globe at AAAS.org

In comparison, no organization exists by religions which protects them from scientists, physicians, engineers, etc., nor is one needed. Unfortunately, rumors based on superstitions or antiquated belief systems are easily spread and run rampant. It can take seemingly centuries to dispel myths, ancient beliefs.

Robert Holmes “Rob” Bell, Jr.’s video is again an example of one Christian’s influence to reconceptionalize. He has common sense, rationally kind motivations which conflict with what the Bible’s God “breathed” as truth in sacred writings/scripture. For instance: Bell is pro gay/gay marriage; Christian God admonishes against.

Rob Bell is the current revisionist amid the Church’s dissonance and need to change God’s viewpoint once again. He disagrees with a portion of the Bible God’s outmoded, painfully unjust and cruel admonitions which to this day continue to harm people of the LGBT community and their right to be loved and valued as human beings.

Bell, who says he feels joy in believing in God, faces His warning given in Revelations 22:18 by desiring to change/add from the “truth” sacred script proscribes.

The New Testament, one may reason, was the first drastic revision measure to add-on stories changing God anew to a tolerant, forgiving, more loving supreme being so as not to lose members.

The last link sent is a person offering his mind set in his blog site. Science is still figuring things out–Christian’s who are scientist, too. Unfortunately, the blogger interviewed by you, Taylor, doesn’t come across as a physicist and there was no info to check his education status to know if he’s in the trenches of research study or just an internet blogger adding personal opinion based on filtered perception which favors the Bible’s story. Yet, someday that will become drastically revised, too haha!

Thanks for sharing links in which one in particular allowed more insight as to how Christianity remains resilient.

The box was invisible, difficult to find and type in word/letter scramble to ensure I’m not a bot. I tapped right and left of Reset and got lucky; the box then appeared on left. The Reset is easy to see because it’s shaded.

I like the cool graphic…looks science-y…guess I was expecting a biblical sky with the sun rays bursting through fat, heavenly looking cumulus clouds haha! I posted a “Hello”. At the time, only you and djinn showed up as “activity”.

Congratulations on your newest site!

Senta and L,
I can now definitively say, all stories told backwards are infinitely better than told forward. What a great read! And now I am wondering what the heck happened to L’s mother, I have to keep reading!!! Hahaha. But first, let me say, Senta, I do want you to know, as your awesome father has told you before God really is walking ahead of you, and opening doors for you. He loves you more than you will ever know. This is Truth with a capital T. Real truth. Truth that underpins the creation of the cosmos. And He loves you too L.

Did you guys read the Count of Monte Cristo? Adored that book. Edmond Dantes says to Abbe Farid I believe it was, “I don’t believe in God.” And Farid responds with, “It doesn’t matter. He believes in you.” And this is the crux of it. He really does believe in you both. Equally. So much so he died for you. Regicide. Deicide. Suicide. For you. And actually, did you guys see The Passion of Christ? The Mel Gibson movie? Gorgeous film. Did you know that Mel Gibson was the one holding the spike to be driven into Christ’s wrist? Mel is such an idiot. But so am I! I am the one that put him up there. Me! Well you too can have some credit, but that is none of my business. I sinned enough on my own to put him there. (Caviziel, Christ, also played Edmond Dantes! So great!!)

If you go search out my early comments on this site and compare them, I have come a long way. I wasn’t so “even handed” as Senta has said I was with you L. So that was just a fluke that I was kind! Hahah. But I learned something. Many times how you respond is way way more important than what you respond with. L, you were gracious in return. Even though I am responding to you from a place and a mindset that carries great baggage for you. In your eyes, you see Christianity and you see, Holy Rollers and snake oil salesmen maybe. You see Swindlers and cheats. And as I said, many “Christians” are cheats. Many are liars. But that doesn’t mean it is what God intended.

Senta? You want to talk about saying the unsayable? I’m about to throw down. We have left the age of the Jews. And we are in the age of the Gentiles. The Jews have been sans temple for nigh on 2,000 years. The basis of the Jewish system is the sacrifice, and they are not allowed to sacrifice anywhere but in the temple. Which Herod destroyed. What does it mean? It means that the Jews have neglected their Christ. It means that God is up to something new and different. What?!?

In Luke 21:24, Jesus speaks of future events, including the destruction of Jerusalem and His return. He says that “Jerusalem will be trampled underfoot by the Gentiles, until the times of the Gentiles are fulfilled”. A similar phrase is found in Romans 11:25, which says, “A partial hardening has come upon Israel, until the fullness of the Gentiles has come in”… and it was prophesied it would happen back in the Ezekiel passage Senta discusses. (Daniel 2:31-45) the visions. I love studying the prophesies and the explicitness of their coming to fruition. It’s pretty freaky really.

but why? Why? Why the age of gentiles!?!?

It was so that the good news of Christ, the good news of salvation could be brought to the entire world. The truth can be told to everyone. That’s why.

Now, to Senta’s comment about political correctness and the chaos of the world. Yes, you are right. In the last times wisdom will be traded in for folly. We will exchange natural for the unnatural. But L, from your seat, I am the one that is deluded. I get it. You got so upset when you found out – or assumed – I was done searching. Or that I had settled on a view. It seems like you liked me better when I was the epitome of the scientific method, or of an even handed, undecide even. But now that I am sure that I have found what I was looking for, you see upset because I had been duped. i think anyway.

Much of modern church makes me gag. That link I sent you about Everything is Spiritual is the antithesis of church and yet, it is the cornerstone and the pinnacle of how is see my own faith. In the center of all of my life. My job, my view on art, science, math, the cosmos, everything. Holistically, completely. Even my view on zombie movies. Hahaha. Seriously though. But so many modern Christians don’t get that at all. But I digress.

Yes, Senta, in the world’s desire for “openness”, “fairness”, scientific method, they have begun to shutdown honest and open debate. In most places, I am welcome to discuss UFO’s inseminating this planet. I am welcome to discuss string theory and the infinite universes it would take to make evelution happen. But if I step up to the lectern and say that God loves them? I’d be hoisted on my own petard. I’d be boo’d out. Why? Why is that?

I’ll speak truth to that lie. It’s because the question, the real actual question at the heart of all of it? Will you bow your knee to a sovereign God is too much. It is the one difficult thing that they cannot do. And so mankind has endeavored to kill God. Nietzsche, “God is dead and we have killed him.” Why has philosophy work so hard to kill this idea of the God shaped hole that Pascal so eloquently elucidated for us:

“What else does this craving, and this helplessness, proclaim but that there was once in man a true happiness, of which all that now remains is the empty print and trace?

“This he tries in vain to fill with everything around him, seeking in things that are not there the help he cannot find in those that are, though none can help, since this infinite abyss can be filled only with an infinite and immutable object; in other words by God himself”

Which better responds to your thinking and wrestling Senta than anything I could ever say myself. You are innately aware of this God shaped hole. Thus the struggle. And everyone has this awareness, but so many numb it in an attempt to avoid the question. Which is, will I bow my knee? Will I say, no, I am not actually the captain of my domain… not the master of my ship. In fact, it’s rudderless, and in desperate need of saving! But because we are moderns, we can’t admit this! This is paramount to failure! Which, is more of this upside down foolishness.

I care for you both, thus my response. L. It’s ok if you don’t buy what I’m selling. I do not take it personally because I am not the one selling it. I am just the lucky one that gets to tell you a bit about it. Senta, it sounds like God is chasing you down. In a good way. Here’s a post I made about that years ago: https://taylorholmes.com/2009/06/04/is-someone-out-to-get-you/ out of which I decided to go get a tattoo and change my life forever. He has your best at heart. We were born broken, and he would like to restore you to your original prevalent state. Give you the purpose and meaning you know deep down inside that has to be there or else none of this makes sense at all.

Yeah, it was tricky talking to both of you simultaneously. Please don’t be offended L. I meant no ill will. Promise. Senta, can’t wait to see your movie review. (You guys do realize on a normal site the post is usually 600 words, you don’t have to make it long like I do!! Hahaha. There is nothing normal about this site at all.

Take care you two. And I am off to sleep. I’ll get to your comment about your mother tomorrow, promise.

Ok, working my way backwards I know Senta generally made a comment about Europe, saw it in my email preview, but only a sentence or two. Just want to join in on the love fest. Senta, L, it’s all good. Take a deep breath! Hahaha. I would much rather strong words fly, that are honest, than polite lies. Here, call a spade a spade. Ok?

I dig you both. I love the conversation. And it is really really hard to understand where I am coming from. Especially about religion. Especially when I saw that Christianity isn’t a religion, rather it’s a relationship. Eh? So yeah. Kick me in the shins. Tell me when I bring piles of baggage and dump it on top of the conversation. I get it.

But just be honest that something I said pissed you off. I’d like to understand you better than I do. Really. Even though you are wrong. Hahahah. Laugh. Joke. Alright, like memento, I’m heading backwards to Senta’s comment… I think anyway. Man you guys can pound out their words with the best of them.

My cousin Babak came to visit as I was typing the above post and he let me read it to him. He reminded me how many Americans have families in Europe and other countries who are in constant cantact. He and his sister left Iran years ago seeking work, a different life; she’s a practicing physician in Italy, whereas “Bobby” an engineer chose the U.S.

Many families here deeply care and are in constant communication with our/their extended families living in Europe/other countries.

As a “side job” he assists a local animal foundation to trap/spade/neuter/release back of feral cats in this big city.

There’s more people doing good things in the world; unfortunately, the media mainly focuses on the bad things people do.

Senta, to respond it seems necessary to “out” myself, give personal info which is uncomfortable for me to do on the internet. As mentioned during another thread of discussion, my identity was stolen. It’s taken a lot of time and effort to make right the many wrongs this person has done. So, here’s some info that may help you understand who you’re communicating with because if you’re thinking about it, you don’t really know me despite a few posts.

I’m almost considered a native of a very populated, highly multicultural city. My neighbors, coworkers come from every country on this planet. Add to this a generation of intermarriage and you find many families, like mine, present a very diversified bunch of relatives. It’s to the point we dare not do an off-joke about any race or nationality because there’s someone in the family who may take offense.

As an “American” I am family to and carry bloodlines of most nationalities in Europe, the proverbial Heinz 57 plus a smidgen Japanese; extended family are Vietnamese, Iranian, South American, Russian, Egyptian, Israeli. I’ve named most but may have forgotten one or two.

As a family, we live in America and are therefore “American” but I don’t feel the “Americans” you speak of in a stereotype of tone fit most people in this vast nation.

There are good and bad people and events going on in this world. One can choose to focus on only the bad things but there really is as much good–if not more so. There are “ugly Americans” who do disservice to America but in no way should all other good people be held in contempt.

You are so very bright, Senta. Your parents value of education shows through the way you communicate. I really think you speak and compose English better than I. My mom was a teacher, beloved and popular with her students. I sometimes “hear” her lovingly correct me in my thoughts when catching grammatical errors after posting. So many times I wish to share something, get advice and feel like a fish out of water knowing she died, is no longer here.

There are still so many things you need to learn just like I do and I’m far older but not necessarily wiser. It seems you feel you have to choose on matters but taking your time to mull things over. Again, this presents wisdom you possess at a young age. What gives me most happiness about you is your love of books; you continue to read and educate yourself even after “school is out”.

I’ve not replied to Taylor’s recent comment because I’ve taken the time to check out the links he provided. He and I are from different “worlds” when it comes to religion. Christianity, due to people’s differing interpretations, splinters off into sects. There seems IMHO “many shades of Atheism”. I’m a shade of atheist who believes, almost similar to Taylor, that science will someday figure out the “Mystery” but I don’t feel it’s the god of this world Taylor and other religions give their faith and devotion. This does not mean I dislike Taylor at all. I really, really think he’s cool.

I read from a reliable source recently something that may be of value for you to know in regards to the mess in the world and particularly your concern Americans do not know what is happening in Europe. The discussion boards caused the site to go down, crash. It shows how many Americans are deeply concerned.

Currently, and since its inception, the U.S. government is almost completely comprised of Christians. Vice President Pence is an Evangelical whom many feel helped Trump win the election. Not all are devout church goers, some may be secretly atheist, but elections are won often based by a candidates belief in god, among other criteria which a voter places value. The majority of Millennials who voted in the past election eschewed the slick politician of both party systems and do not share the same so-called moral concepts of the far right. America has huge problems with what an antiquated electoral vote helped to elect as our president. Church and State get fuzzier and less separate these days; it seems like the Church runs the country these days.

I am now registered “Non-Party” although in early years was Republican, then Democrat. I’ve always voted for the best person for the job, not for party platforms. Because of the way election process is set up, I was unable to vote in the primary election for Bernie Sanders or for Dr. Jill Stein after Sanders lost to Clinton.

I don’t want to diminish from what you shared in your many valid and heartfelt concerns but to widen your perception you are not alone. At your age, I experienced the Hippie generation. Too young to be active–heck, I dressed as a hippie one Halloween! Haha–but young enough to observe and worry greatly that the world seemed at peril. Really young people forced by draft to go fight in a war fought in boundaries, military movements announced on the news seemingly letting “the enemy” know. My step-brother came back so messed up from that war he could never assimilate in society, just kept re-enlisting. He’s now a retired Command Sargent Major playing golf on some green expanse these days, trying to heal from what he’s been through.

As he was just embarking from the plane, wearing his military uniform and about to finally set foot on “home” ground, an unruly throng of hippies surrounded him shouting obscenities, spitting on him. He had no choice, he was drafted, could’ve died! War is insanely stupid. This war was like no other; the country was in chaos.

Most importantly, during those times, the black movement began. Martin Luther King’s assassination, a horrible tragedy. To this day, there are ignorant people who refuse to understand and accept that blacks are equal and deserve the respect and dignity like every other human being. Racism has to stop.

I found this site “Stupid Things White People Say” and found it very enlightening. There were things mentioned I had no idea I’d said. Also, became aware of the many things in childhood which can unknowingly form racist perceptions in a child. I’ll give a tiny example, which is laughable to some people, but has validity: cartoons of my childhood had no people of color all “people toons” were white. The Jetson’s cartoon was my fave and is one example. How many decades of white dolls? Anyway, I respect that site and take no umbrage to it–was able learn become gratefully aware of “hidden” bias in everyday events.

Christians–and all religions–do something similar as parents to their children. They begin indoctrination of their children to their religious belief system at a tender age when a kid’s intelligence has not gained enough wisdom to use debate and logic. The parent’s intentions may seem good, the child loves and emulates their parent, wishing to please; however, it causes perpetuation of a narrow, one-sided view of life.

It’s far wiser if children were taught the history, creed, god(s) of all religions of the world. By an adult age–or however long a person needs–one can choose what they want to believe. Religions don’t like that idea as they need members in order to keep existing.

Despite what Jesus tried to stop, religions/places of worship are a business–a huge business very much playing a hand in worldly matters and not really willing to let people think for themselves lest they lose membership, and the funds, to stay in the “soul saving” business.

Then, there’s Taylor! Haha! Yay! I like him and hope to stay friendly.

I like you, too, Senta. I’m very sorry for disappointing you. I make mistakes, do things I regret–I’m not always right All I can do is be myself and try to change those things I eventually become aware of or am made aware hopefully in a kind way:-) My very last thought or intention in sharing posts was to hurt you.

Please come back to this site as you share certain simpatico with the very awesome, Taylor. I should be the one to leave, not you!

There is a reason why I am here. I cannot tell you this reason because it would halt all conversation and I wish to be like everyone else. But there is a definitive reason why I will not be attending uni this Autumn; why my sister is taking time off to be with me; why my entire family is holidaying in America spending this summer together visiting family that I have never met but who want to meet me. There is a reason why PERSONAL SHOPPER brought me here to this site; because the movie struck a chord with me, my friends, and even my family, and I wanted to know what other people thought. There is a reason why I can be almost offended by all the suppositions that Maureen is a ghost, or that she is a psychotic killer who kills her boss and frames Ingo… Did anyone even read what Assayas said about his movie? It is a story of a young woman coming into her own at the apex of tragedy, where a girl has to rediscover herself; it is a tale of a girl coming to terms with grief. It is told in genres, the alienation, the depression, the naive desire to touch the one who has passed on because she cannot accept his death. She hurts so much, has been gutted so mercilessly by loss, that she looks in all the wrong places for relief from the pain. Ultimately it becomes an epiphany, a realization that she must look inside herself for the answers, that recovery begins when we face our sorrow and pain. The fact that she could die at any moment adds gravity to her decision to move on. Life is tenuous. Time is on no one’s side. Do not waste it.

My parents raised two daughters to think for themselves. My father, lacking a son, taught us the lessons he would have taught him: fight for what you believe, take no prisoners, right makes might, etc. My parents gave us the best education money could buy. My sister is on scholarship with a free ride through uni, just as my parents had done. I did it too…sort of. Until something happened and plans were changed. So I am in America now, getting myself sorted, and helping my family cope.

I say all of this to give myself a starting point, and no matter how weird it may sound, it has a point. …I am from Europe and I can tell Americans, it is disintegrating no matter what your media tells you here. If you speak out against Islam, your leftist media accuses you of being a bigot. If you say Islam is a religion of war and destruction, created by Mohammed to bring people under his rule, you are a bigot. What Americans forget, and their leftist schools do not teach you, is that centuries ago, Islamic hordes swept across Europe, slaughtering hundreds of thousands in the name of Allah, selling European women into slavery, castrating males; name it, they did it. For centuries they ruled with an iron fist. It was not until Europe rose up and rallied back with the Crusades that drove them out of Europe, all the way to Jerusalem, at a very heavy cost. People forget that. All they say is the Crusaders raped and pillaged the Middle East. They forget that Europe drove out its occupiers who raped and pillaged them for centuries. Islam treated Europe like chattel. What the Crusaders did in the Middle East does not compare to what Islam did to Europe. Now they are passively taking over Europe again under the guise of refugees. They make no bones about it – they mean to take over Europe, and yet the European politicians do nothing to protect their own people. The Muslims openly say that the Europeans do not own Europe! They feel it is not ours to have. If I pass by young men and boys, they tell me they are going to rape me and I will enjoy it because I am a whore. If a Frenchman would ever say that openly in the streets, shouting it and taunting girls before everyone’s eyes, they would be arrested, but not the Muslims. It is madness. They are not a religion of peace. But I would be a bigot for saying this. That is the madness of the world I must grow up in. I live in a world where a man (Jenner) can become Woman of the Year, and people cheer. I could go on but I would be considered a narrow-minded person. My point is, there is something intrinsically evil happening in this world, and it is conditioning the entire world to accept it. If you do not, you are a bigot. It has no respect for boundaries, nations or peoples, or religions. The world is spiraling towards a Gotterdammerung, but it will be the twilight of man, not of gods.

When my sister and I were very little, da would read to us stories from the Bible the same way my mother would read faerie tales. He would do all the voices, sound effects, and take on faces and expressions. There was one story from the Old Testament that we always loved. It was about Nebuchadnezzar, the king of Babylon. Once the greatest kingdom the world had ever known, my da would describe the city in detail, how wide the walls were; about the hanging gardens that were one of the wonders of the ancient world. We would listen enthralled. He told us the story of Daniel, an Israelite who was taken captive when Jerusalem was destroyed. Through God’s hand, Daniel rose through the ranks and eventually became a sort of prime minister to the king, because he had proven to be a fine, honest, upstanding man whose god was formidable. One night the king had a dream that terrified him, but he could not remember it. So he asked all of his wise men, soothsayers and prophets, to come forward and tell him what the dream meant. Of course, they could not tell him because the king himself could not remember the dream, let alone tell them what it was so that they could interpret it. This angered the king because they should know what his dream was without him having to tell them if they truly had any powers at all. He threatened to kill them all for being charlatans. Word got to Daniel that the king was troubled by a dream that he could not remember and he was threatening to slay all his wise men. So Daniel got up and went to the King and said, by the grace of God, I can tell you your dream. Daniel went on to tell him there was a great statue in this dream. It had a beautiful golden head, silver chest and arms, bronze stomach and hips, iron legs, and feet of clay mixed with iron. A rock smashes into its feet and topples the entire statue, like wheat on a threshing floor, signifying a complete demolishment. The king happily agreed that was his dream and asked for the meaning. Daniel tells Nebuchadnezzar that the king is the golden head, the most precious metal, the most coveted. Babylon would be the greatest empire ever to grace the earth; no empire since would match its majesty and glory, but it would fall to succeeding empires symbolized by the differing metals. We now know through our study of history that Babylon fell to the Medo-Persian empire, signifying the silver, a less valuable metal but still valued. Then Alexander the Great would conquer the Persians, and Greece would rise up in the Bronze Age (bronze being their central metal). It was a lesser metal than silver signifying as great as this empire was, it was no match in glory compared to Medo-Persia. As we know, no empire lasts forever. Greece would fall to Rome in the Iron Age (known for their steel which was far superior in strength than bronze). And as great as Rome was, it was no match for the lasting glory of Greece which left the world so much heritage that we live by even to his day. Rome would crumble and fraction after the death of Christ; its conquered kingdoms splintering into kingdoms and countries, but history teaches us the Holy Roman Empire, a Christian Pagan church would rise and try to hold the kingdoms together to no avail. We know those countries today as Europe, a mixture of iron (the Holy Roman Church) and clay, the countries that surround it. Many times dictators and despots have tried to unite Europe into an empire but all efforts have failed – Charlemagne, Napoleon, Hitler and now the EU, but it will not hold together. Clay and iron cannot mix, it has no strength. Many believe the feet of clay and iron signify the antichrist’s coming empire of complete apostasy, and it is in this time the mountainous rock signifying the return of Christ, smashes the feet made of clay, toppling the pompous glory of mankind’s empires, and ending the world as we know it. Centuries before these empires existed, the Bible foretold their birth and passing, even unto today.

Europe is teetering; it is crumbling. It cannot be united. The Bible has predicted it, but no one seems to be listening. A one world government will not work. The world will never unite as one. My da says it goes back to the Tower of Babel, when men spoke one language, were one people. They had forgotten about God and erected their own monuments to their own vanity. They wanted to build a tower into the sky where they believed gods lived so that they could be like gods too. So with a snap, God divided them by language so that they could not understand each other and remain united in their vain bid to dominate the world under one rule. But even now, that same evil wants to unite the world as one. It has never stopped trying. What is that evil? …Who is that evil?

My generation could be the last generation before complete anarchy. The Bible says in the last days, the people of the world will rise up and realize they have been deceived, and they will turn on those who have deceived them with a vengeance, but it will be too late. Jesus will come and probation closes. Do I believe this? I do not know. But…how did the Bible know? My da told me these stories when I was growing up, but they were just faerie tales. Does this weigh on me now? …I cannot even feel or put into words how angry I am over the globalist agenda and what they intend to do to the world to make it their own. They will never stop and we can ignore it at our peril, or we can confront it. Am I witnessing prophesy unfold? Am I in denial? I do not know. I am just a kid. I may sound smart to you, I may have scholarships, but what will it matter. I will be long gone.

@ L, when I read what you initially wrote to Taylor, it made me really sad. You had always come across as someone really tolerant and level-headed, but you went on the offensive when you did not have to. Even my sister was shocked. Although you two have since made up, thanks to Taylor’s even-handed temperament, it still made me really sad when I followed your exchange. I could not believe it was happening, even here. It is a sadness that keeps growing because it is multiplied exponentially across the world, splitting it down the middle, where even on the internet, differences can flare up in an instant, unprovoked except for what we perceive as an affront to our sensibilities. Why are we like this? Every comment section across Youtube, Yahoo, Fox, CNN is rife with animosity and name calling, where out of nowhere people just flare up. The Bible said in the last days the spirit of the Devil will run rife, it will come out of people’s mouths in their actions and speech, and they will have no self control. As God withdraws his spirit from the world, the hearts of children will grow cold; the good man will remain good and the evil man will remain evil, and every man will reap what he has sown…and then the end. It is watching these prophesies unfold that have me rattled, because I am living it across the pond. I am watching an evil grow so fast and so furiously, and no one is doing a thing. Reading you attack Taylor and Taylor defending himself made me feel helpless. I told my da that. It is why I cried.

You guys matter to me. I made some friends on the internet, something I have never done because I do not do websites and talk to strangers. Maybe to you guys it is no big thing; it is just the internet, yes. You talk all the time to strangers, but not me. I do not live on the net that way. I am bookish. The net is my encyclopedia. When I am on it, I merely educate myself. I am looking up questions every other minute. My mind is a sponge. I want answers, not friends, so I do not even try. But I did here…because I am looking for something, I guess, but maybe…here is my epiphany. Like Maureen, I am looking in all the wrong places. I am trying to plug a hole with people and intellect that take my mind off the obvious…but maybe I should be looking for God…because people cannot save me. And I already know I cannot save myself.

I am going to take a break from this site for a short while. And not because you two momentarily flared up in a religious argument, but because I do not know what to make of my life. Of God. And watching you two momentarily get heated for no reason, scared me. This spirit of strife and dissension is everywhere. I almost got involved, to stop it, but my da said to step away, that this was not my debate. If I was Christian I could, and if I was anti-Christian, I could, but I am neither, so I have no business interfering. I am simply a kid who has seen too much evil spread too fast, and I do not know what it means. And I have to sort that out, and get myself sorted in the process.

But I will be back. I have to do my ARRIVAL comment yet. My da and I watched it together per your suggestion and we loved it, thus what I am writing is becoming a book. But you know this of me already. ;) And I am making a post like you promised me on the BEFORE SUNSET page, Taylor. :) I am going to hold you to it. My sister has agreed to help, because the movie I have chosen is one we both liked, so that will be fun. And L, I am sorry for what happened to your mother; that is an ugly thing. No one should be taken advantage of like that, and you can be assured if there is a God, then those people will be punished for their heartlessness, their greed and their fakery. Remember what I told you about counterfeit Christians. The world is full of them. They outnumber the true Christians a hundred to one. They give Christ a bad name, because they are nothing like him, but there are Christians who are, like my father, like Taylor. They walk the talk. Because I cannot accept religions, or gods, or God, has nothing to do with counterfeit Christians. It has everything to do with myself. I have a grudge, and if there is a God, then I have a problem with him, and I only have so much time to figure it out. I promise I will.

And you guys, do me a favor – stay on middle ground while I am gone. You are friends. Do that for me.

I love science. I love learning about the universe. About the planets. About the sun. What have you. But that should be obvious to you… because I believe that all of the universe was perfectly designed by a loving an beneficent father. I expected you to intuit my position better than you did. hahaha. You are smarter than that.

You assume that all of science collides and conflicts with the idea of God and it doesn’t. It just doesn’t.

An example? I have done a lot of study on rewinding the planets back to the time of Christ’s birth to see if the signs in the stars were actually there. Were the Magi on track? They signs should be there right? I don’t hold back from anything scientific. (Or even archeological evidence.) I have zero fear looking at every possible evidentiary opportunity. Zero. Because if God created it, it should add up. And heck, let’s be frank, God says throughout the Bible he created the marvels of the universe in order to point people to Him. So, frick, it better add up.

Where you and I diverge, is that somethings we don’t know yet. Somethings are hidden and veiled. I mean, seriously, 300 years ago, we have this conversation? Holy cow! Your position is different and so is mine. So I have to leave room for future learning, but I’m not going to bag out on you because of that.

One area that I am confused on personally? The discussion of the literal seven days of creation and the figurative seven days. Did God jump start light and make it arrive immediately? Or did he allow the light to arrive in time, on the third… “DAY”? I have zero crisis about the difference, but I am curious. If you want to spend an hour and learn how I literally perceive the creative beginnings of the world, you can watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2rklwkm_dQ by Rob Bell (a very controversial Christian pastor, that has been taken under the wing of Oprah… different conversation.) who walks through the opening of the Bible and ultimately explains how … wait for it … everything is spiritual.

But I hear you yelling from at your laptop… BUT DARWIN MAN! BUT EVOLUTION! SERIOUSLY! https://taylorholmes.com/2016/03/04/the-revolution-against-evolution/ – in your mind you believe that the science is irrefutable that man evolved from ape, backwards through protozoa. But creationists have made some really fascinating arguments lately, most specifically (and there are others) the idea of irreducible complexity. That I have yet to hear a good argument against, save for, enough tries, and enough attempts… But I really don’t want to devolve into a discussion about evolution. I feel about evolution how I feel about everyone adoring super heroes movies… just because everyone says it doesn’t mean it is, in fact true. hehe.

You asked about my ability to interact with science. And the short answer is, science, everywhere I look, affirms my belief in God. Not detracts from it. I embrace science and look for hints of the Bible’s greater knowledge of the world around us.

I swear I said, just a quick link and go… and here I am paragraphs later. Sorry! hahah.