NEWSFLASH:: This Wednesday, 8/18, and Friday, 8/20, you can join the premiere of “When I Consume You” online. (Learn more by clicking this link right here. But trust me, I’m thinking you’ll need to read more of this post before you can make it all work.)
Later on, like this weekend, or next week, after I write a review of “When I Consume You” and I can’t stop talking about this new film from the brilliant minds of Perry Blackshear, MacLeod Andrews, Evan Dumouchel, and Libby Ewing… you will inevitably say to me, by calling my personal cell phone number, (which you illegally hacked from the local white pages gods), “hey, UUHHHHHH, how do I watch this crazy cool movie that you annoyingly can’t stop talking about?”
My response? To your future self? I’m going to point you to THIS POST. AND in THIS POST right here!??! It says, because you can read it for yourself…. you are screwed. Done for. Finished. Wait a year. Or something. This post is telling your future self, that this is your only chance to watch When I Consume You until it is released. Which, uhm. it has no release date yet. So, if you would like to, for once, take my word for it… and listen to me when I tell you that this movie is going to be amaze-balls, you will need to listen to me TODAY as I explain to you, in detail, how to watch this movie, TOMORROW. (Or Friday… ) But maybe we should just slow all this down… and I’ll talk you through it, step by step. There will be a few tricks to this if you are not a Canadian… so, buckle up.
Movie: When I Consume You
Film Festival: Fantasia Film Fest
Premier Dates: August 18th 9:30pm Eastern, August 20th 9am Eastern
Premier Cost: $8.00 ($8 measly American? Oh, no, actually Canadian. I think that’s $US. Whatever.)
Premier Link: https://fantasiafestival.com/en/film/when-i-consume-you
Breathing into a bag. Got that?
Step 1: Be in Canada
Alright, this will work easily for all of you CANADIANS out there. You click the link, buy the tickets. Voila. But for us Americans, I’m going to teach you a thing or two about slide stepping into Canada from the comfort of your own home. If you already own a VPN, use it. If you do not, then a VPN will solve that problem… (Is this illegal? I 100% do not know. Nor do I really care. Why do production companies block streaming to only specific locations? Who’s to say you don’t live there, and are only visiting the US? Who’s to say that you just want the content that is rightfully yours??) If you are still interested, then swing by a VPN provider, and purchase a month’s worth of VPN, and voila. (If you want to know what kind of VPN I use, PrivateVPN (I don’t get any affiliate credit or money from that link, just telling you which one I like the most.) I think I paid $50 for 2 years? What is that? $2 a month or something? They allow 6 simultaneous streams, from different locations? Hahahah. I swear to God this isn’t an ad. I’m just saying, that the tech is pretty legit now a days.
Step 2: Transact Like a Canadian
Here’s where this gets trickier. When I first connected to the Fantasia Festival site, and I saw the buy button I thought I was home free. But when I tried to buy the ticket, I kept getting this error, no matter what credit card I used:
That is not a good error message. Not for a determined American like myself that is determined to be a part of this premier. So I started thinking. Temporarily move my Paypal account over to a Canadian residence. Denied. Paypal requires you to shut your account down and open a new one to change countries. Get a one time use credit card/debit card? Requires bank accounts and address validations? What about a quick bank account? My family has one in Switzerland, and I’ve had a bank account in England that I’ve maintained since I went to school there. How hard could this be? Ah. Hard. Well, more duration than a week anyway.
Then I realized, what if I just hired someone in Canada to buy me a ticket? Sort of a GrubHub for online movie premieres! I regularly hire developers the world over to build me apps and code for random ideas that I have had. This is basically that, no? So, I started with Task Rabbit. Nope, they are too focused on interacting with physical locations. Couldn’t figure out how to find someone in Canada from America. But then I realized my old standby of Upwork.com could work. I posted a task to purchase a movie ticket from someone in Canada, and got one interested individual. She didn’t think it was real at first – and was pretty sure I was scamming her. But once I gave her some of the details, and assured her all I needed to do was to make a $6 American purchase on a Canadian website, she was in.
Never Mind…
I really thought that I was going to be able to share with you all a tip on how to get a great movie, early, and on the cheap. A little VPN, a little money, blam! Done. But no, this post basically turned into a monument to my personal movie insanity. Look. When you find Indie film makers you love – do everything you can to support them. There will be a Q&A after the movie, and I’ll be sure to ask a few questions, and one of them will be, when will this movie hit American audiences?
But the great news? In chatting with MacLeod about the details about the premiere, I was FINALLY, offered to do an interview with Perry Blackshear. You know, the technically elusive, and brilliant brain behind this movie, They Look Like People, and The Siren. I’ve been trying to chat with him for years and years! Okay, maybe five years. But still. I’m excited!
So yeah – while this is technically possible… I’m guessing I’m the only idiot out there to do all of this in order to watch this particular movie. Moderation is not my strong suit.
Edited by: CY